58: What If the Life You’re Waiting For Is Already Happening? | Peace Is Every Step by Thich Nhat Hanh – Badass Books and Besties
Introduction
In life, we all face challenges that can seem insurmountable. Whether it’s a sudden accident or a personal setback, these moments test our resilience and determination. In this blog post, we’ll explore the incredible journey of Tina Brandau, a life, leadership, and business coach who faced a life-altering accident that left her functioning like a seven-year-old. Despite the odds, Tina not only recovered but went on to become a successful coach, author, and speaker, inspiring others to overcome their own challenges.
The Life-Altering Moment
In this episode, you’ll hear from Tina Brandau, the premier life, leadership, and business “Success Coach.” Tina’s life changed in an instant when a tree fell on her while she was training for a marathon. At the time, she was a successful business executive, mother, and wife, living a life that seemed perfectly on track. But the accident left her with severe brain injuries, reducing her cognitive and physical functions to those of a young child. Doctors told her she would never function beyond the level of a seven-year-old, a prognosis that would have crushed most people.
Yet, Tina’s story is one of resilience. Despite this devastating diagnosis, she refused to accept it as her final fate. Instead, she made a decision to fight back, to reclaim her life, and to surpass even her previous achievements.
Setting Goals and Focusing on the Future
One of the key factors in Tina’s recovery was her ability to set and focus on goals. Even when her cognitive abilities were severely impaired, she used her background in goal-setting and leadership development to guide her recovery. Instead of focusing on long-term goals, which seemed impossible at the time, Tina set short-term, manageable goals. This approach allowed her to make incremental progress, which eventually added up to significant improvements in her condition.
In the interview, you’ll hear Tina’s story of how she endured this horrific accident that hindered her ability to function completely. But, as you will hear, she overcame this obstacle in such a beautiful way. From this experience, she slowly pieced her life back together, one pea at a time (which you’ll understand that reference a bit later in the episode).
Tina’s story emphasizes the importance of knowing where you want to go. Whether you’re recovering from an accident or facing any other life challenge, having a clear vision and setting achievable goals is crucial. It’s not about making giant leaps, but about taking one small step at a time.
The Power of Tenacity and Mindset
A significant part of Tina’s recovery was her mindset. She constantly reminded herself that she was okay, even on the days when moving a small object from one place to another could take hours. This tenacity, combined with a focus on the present moment, allowed her to stay committed to her recovery, even when the progress was slow.
Tina also shares an important lesson about avoiding comparison. During her recovery, it would have been easy for her to compare herself to her peers who were continuing their lives without interruption. However, she chose to focus on her own journey and progress, knowing that comparison could only lead to discouragement. This mindset allowed her to remain positive and motivated throughout her recovery.
Transitioning to a New Career: From Corporate Executive to Success Coach
Before her accident, Tina was a corporate executive with over 30 years of experience in leadership development and goal setting. After her recovery, she transitioned into a new role as a success coach, using her experience to help others achieve their goals. Tina’s decision to leave her corporate job and create Success Coaching Solutions came from a desire to make a broader impact.
She has never looked back. Now, 15 years later, Tina shares the lessons she learned along the way, including the strategies she’s used to become the powerhouse businesswoman she is today. Her successful business has been achieved through hard work & dedication, taking little steps to achieve her goal.
The Role of Support and Surrounding Yourself with Positivity
As Tina’s story highlights, no one overcomes challenges alone. Surrounding yourself with positive influences and supportive people is essential for staying motivated and on track. Tina’s journey underscores the importance of having a strong support system, whether it’s friends, family, or a coach who can offer guidance and encouragement.
For those who might feel alone in their struggles, Tina’s advice is to seek out connections with others who have faced similar challenges or who can offer the support needed to keep moving forward. The right people can help you see possibilities you might not have considered and can provide the encouragement needed to keep going, even on the hardest days.
Inspiring Others to Become Unstoppable
Tina inspires you to believe that you too can become unstoppable! Stop saying that one day, “I will…” because guess what? That day has arrived! Make the necessary changes you need to make TODAY to make your dream life happen. Her story is a testament to the idea that our careers and lives can evolve in unexpected ways. She now spends her days inspiring others, helping them navigate their own challenges and achieve success in both life and business.
Defining Success and the Importance of Book Clubs
You’ll also hear how Tina defines success, her top book recommendations for business, and why book clubs are essential! For Tina, success isn’t just about financial gain or reaching the top of the corporate ladder—it’s about doing what lights you up and brings you joy. Whether it’s running her book club, speaking to audiences around the country, or coaching clients to achieve their goals, Tina has found fulfillment in helping others unlock their potential and live their best lives.
Conclusion
Tina Brandau’s story is a powerful reminder that we are capable of more than we often believe. Whether you’re facing a life-altering event or simply trying to navigate the ups and downs of everyday life, the lessons from Tina’s journey can offer guidance and inspiration. By setting goals, maintaining a positive mindset, surrounding yourself with support, and believing in your worth, you too can overcome adversity and achieve success in life and business.
Learn more about Tina’s company, Success Coaching Solutions and find out more about her specific programs & offers here: Tina Brandau Linktree
You can also find her book, here: Standing Strong: The Real-Life Story of Overcoming Adversity and Becoming Unstoppable in Life and Business
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I’d love to hear your thoughts! Join the conversation by following me on Facebook, becoming part of my Facebook community, and checking out more episodes of my podcast. Together, let’s continue to inspire and uplift one another on this journey of embracing our true selves.
Podcast Interview Transcript
Brianna Brown [00:00:00]: So hi, and welcome to this episode of the Living Your Most Badass podcast. Today, I have Tina Brandau. Hello, Tina.
Tina Brandau [00:00:08]: Hello. Hello. Thanks for having me.
Brianna Brown [00:00:10]: Yes. So much. I’m so excited to interview you. Tina is the premier life leadership and business coach also known as a Success Coach, which I love that title so much. She is an author, international speaker, coach, and founder of Success Coaching Solutions, as well as a business executive of 30 years, a wife, a mom, a lifelong learner, and serial entrepreneur, which I love as well. She believes the biggest challenge in life is to become all that you have the possibility of becoming. And I love that. So welcome, welcome,
Tina Brandau [00:00:42]: Thank you. I am so excited to be here. I just love talking with people about what’s possible.
Brianna Brown [00:00:49]: Yes. And I think that’s so valuable to have conversation just to learn from others because there’s always so much value that you can have from a conversation. So what makes you your most bad ass self?
Tina Brandau [00:01:02]: Wow. That’s a loaded question. Can we take 3 hours and let me unpack that?
Brianna Brown [00:01:06]: Let’s go. Let’s do it.
Tina Brandau [00:01:08]: So what makes me my badass self is, a, the fact that I’m sitting here able to talk to you. That’s truly what makes me my bad ass self.
Brianna Brown [00:01:17]: I love that.
Tina Brandau [00:01:18]: So do you want me to dive in the story, or do you want me to pull back a little?
Brianna Brown [00:01:23]: Yeah. I would love to because we’re going to eventually get into that. So if that’s part of what makes you so badass, then let’s just dive right on in.
Tina Brandau [00:01:30]: I will. I wasn’t sure if you wanted me to kind of just give an allure of what’s to come or if you want me to go for it. So I’m gonna go for it. Yeah. So I am sitting here talking to you right now after having been told that I would never function beyond that three-year-old again. Wow. Never function beyond that of a three-year-old. Later I was functioning like a seven-year-old and they told me these infamous words. They said, congratulations. You’ve reached your MMI, your maximum medical improvement. Now, spoiler alert. Okay? Spoiler alert. I don’t function like a seven-year-old anymore. I make that, like, one sometimes. don’t — But I definitely do not function like a seven-year-old again.
Brianna Brown [00:02:16]: So at what age did they tell you this?
Tina Brandau [00:02:19]: I was forty years old. Wow. I was forty years old. I was a very seasoned executive. I had my life together. I had reached every goal I wanted until literally in the flash of a second. My life was shattered. I was running. I was trading for a marathon. I know. I know. I don’t look like a marathon runner. It’s okay to laugh at that too. because — Well,
Brianna Brown [00:02:43]: I just think about when anytime someone says that they’re on runner. I’m like, oh, all I do is jump to conclusions. I don’t know if I could run any marathons, you know, but more power to those who love to run.
Tina Brandau [00:02:53]: Let’s be really clear about it before I started running this marathon as a way to raise money for a very important event. before that, I actually joke all the time. The only thing I ever ran after was the ice cream truck. So let’s get really clear about it. Okay. So I was training for this marathon, and I was doing all my running and everything. And I went for a run this particular morning, and I happen to be running at the exact space and time that a tree snapped and fell. That tree came down across the path I was on, and it hit me. bleeding me an utter mess, and that is what caused my functioning to become that. of a three-year-old. So I’m my bad ass self because number 1, I survived. I’m a living miracle. People die from being hit by trees and everything. You don’t ever hear about it because people don’t live to tell the story. Or if they do, they’re not functioning where they can tell the story. So yes, I’m badass for that, but I’m also a badass because I was able to find my way back to not only being me, but doing more than I ever envisioned I could do.
Brianna Brown [00:04:04]: Which is just an incredible transformation because some people might experience that and then just feel like, okay. I’ll just give up. You know, there’s nothing left to live for. So what pushed you forward? And how did you get out of that particular predicament and move past that?
Tina Brandau [00:04:21]: That’s a really common question that I get. How did you do that? How can I do something like that?
Brianna Brown [00:04:27]: Right. Right.
Tina Brandau [00:04:28]: You may not have been hit by a tree, but everybody in life has challenges. Right? Everybody faces change. How do you get through it? Well, there’s a few different things that I did. And the first and foremost was I always knew where I was going. If you don’t know where you’re going, you’re never gonna get there. I knew where I was going. My background had been teaching people how to set and reach major goals. I helped corporations do this. and I was like, okay, I know how to set goals. I can set goals. I’m seven years old in my own processing. I can set goals. I couldn’t set goals the way that I did before. And some of your listeners out there right now might be thinking, I don’t like I don’t like setting goals. I don’t like setting visions. I don’t like doing any of that. It’s not don’t think about goals and visions as a bad thing. Think of them as just your way finder because that’s really what they are. They’re the thing that helps you get to that next point. And for me and my visioning, I had to go timing. Like, literally, what do I wanna be doing in an hour from now? What do I wanna be doing in a week from now? What do I wanna be doing in a month from now? I couldn’t say 5 years from now, I’m gonna do X Y and say, that wasn’t even on my radar. It wasn’t even in the possibility for me at that time. Yeah. So staying focused on where I was going was so important and I knew I wanted to be me again and that’s what I kept striving for a little bit better each day.
Brianna Brown [00:05:51]: Yeah. And I think it’s so important to remember that the only person you should try to be better than is the person you were yesterday. And I think that hearing that story, you know, and being able to overcome that, it teaches you so much about your tenacity as a person. Like, you probably learned so much about yourself that you didn’t know before. So do you feel like that experience was meant to happen in order to push you to another level, or is it something that you’re like, well, I wish I could have learned the lesson in a different way so that I didn’t have to get hit by a tree. You know, do you feel like It was meant to happen that way.
Tina Brandau [00:06:27]: Alright. So I’m gonna give you another little inside scoop to me here. I was a little bit hardheaded. Okay? I was a little bit hard to before that. And I actually joke off and that I had to get whacked upside the head with a tree to get me to stop long enough. Listen. So, seriously, I would rather have done it a different way. Absolutely. Do I regret it happening? Not in the least. because it made me who I am. Have I been tenacious my whole life? Yes. I have a little bit of tenacity on me. Is it magnified now? You better believe it is.
Brianna Brown [00:07:02]: So what were the steps after it happened? You know, because obviously someone had to find you, and I’m sure you tell that in your in your book that we’ll talk about called standing strong, which I love the premise behind the book. The cover, like, really, you know, shows, like, your growth as a person well as what caused you to experience that growth and just the healing process after that. Because like you said, the doctor said you would never function again. So what happened in the aftermath immediately? Like, did someone find you? Did you immediately start to function where you had to go through physical therapy? Like, what were the steps that happened after that moment?
Tina Brandau [00:07:40]: So, no. No one found me. I had to find someone. And so the funny thing is I was I was going in and out of consciousness, and I’m not gonna give it all the way, but I accidentally found someone Okay? So and I don’t believe there are things as accidents in this world, right?
Brianna Brown [00:07:57]: So yeah.
Tina Brandau [00:07:58]: So I’m not gonna give away the how I got to someone, but I will say eventually I was able to be taken out of the woods because I was running on a wooded path. I was able to be taken out of the woods and got into a hospital and had amazing care and They were thrilled that my skull wasn’t broken. I never even knew that a broken skull was on the table. So much happened in it and I packed it all into the book, but I think the more important question you ask is what happened next? Right? What was that thing that happened? I got little tiny things I had to do in order to move myself forward. So yes, I did therapies, but when I would do physical therapy, would start seizures. And when so I ended up with what’s called a coup contrecoup brainstem injury. For those of us who are not medical, and I certainly was not, it basically means I damage both sides of my brain and the brain stem. So I was a mess. It was the trifecta. The one time you don’t wanna win at everything, I wanted everything. I got it all. I did not want that, but I had it. And so I had to do all kinds of things. I did speech therapy. I had neurosurgeons. I had neurologists. I had occupational therapy. I had speech therapy. I had it all having to go on. And what I really just the very basic thing I had to do was learn how to use my body again.
Brianna Brown [00:09:25]: Oh, yeah.
Tina Brandau [00:09:27]: My side to my body when your brain the sides of your brain damage. They don’t work together anymore. When I would actually go to clap my hands, my hands would pass patch pass. Ask. That’s hard to say. Body each other. We’ll say it anyway. We would swing through each other in the air. I could not make my hands clap together. and so I had to learn how to reinvigorate the neural pathways in my brain reconnect them so that I could do basic fine motor skills that a young child, a three-year-old can do. So one of the exercises I had to do, I want you to picture this with me. is take a little tiny plastic cup like a Rubbermaid cup, a Tupperware cup filled with little, teeny tiny plastic peas and the little, teeny tiny pair of plastic scissors. I’m sorry. No. Tweezers. Tweezers. Thank you. I had to take the tweezers and pick up a pee and put it in another cup. Some days, some days it would take me 8 hours to move one e. Some days I could move them all 30 because there was 30 I had to do. 30 p’s can be moved in 2 hours. but some days it was 8 hours to move 1. And, this is what it comes down to for every single person listening. You have to do it one pea at a time. And whatever you’re doing, it’s that one step in front of you, with focus and determination doing that one thing in front of you no matter how hard it is to be clear Moving one key can cause me to have a seizure, but it’s hard to do that one pea. So I actually have people now that have t shirts that say one pee at a time on them. because they, like, us taking it 1 P at a time.
Brianna Brown [00:11:19]: And I love that because sometimes people forget they see, like, the big picture, and they think, how am I going to get there? How am I going to get one step ahead? And it’s, like, just little step after little step. And I can’t even imagine that having to do that motion would be, at first, probably so frustrating because you’d want to be able to just move all of so fast. Or it’s kinda like people who’ve had a stroke, and they just wanna be able to speak. So inside of your mind, even though your body wasn’t able to do what you wanted, How was your mindset at that time? Like, did you feel that you had to get over your frustration so much, or did you feel like you knew what you wanted to do, and you just said, nope. I’m gonna I’m gonna move that p no matter what. I’m going to get it. I’m going to get it.
Tina Brandau [00:12:07]: The beauty of what happened to me is that I could only focus on one thing at a time because my brain wouldn’t let me take in all kinds of other things. So with that focus, I was able to stay completely dedicated to that pee and just do it over and over and over and over again. It was as if I was wearing blinders to the world. What also happened with that mindset shift, though, is I kept telling myself I’m okay. I’m okay. And I think we both know that most of us especially women struggle with comparisonitis. Oh, yeah. We struggle with it, but here’s the thing about where I was. If you think about this, I’m forty years old, and elated ecstatic over the moon that some moment I can move a single p when all my other peers and friends and family are doing amazing things. then I can’t even begin to comprehend. That in and of itself could have derailed me completely if I have comparisonitis. I would have bought myself so much lesser than them if I had compared myself. So removing the option of comparison saved me.
Brianna Brown [00:13:28]: Oh, yeah.
Tina Brandau [00:13:28]: And it and it simplified me. So and I will be honest with you. As my memory started coming back and as my function started coming back, so did comparisonitis. And I had to make a choice, and here’s what it really is. It’s a decision not to allow it.
Brianna Brown [00:13:46]: Yeah. Especially the not letting it get to you because so often We think that we have to be at this particular level. We have to do as the one that used to be called, like, the Joneses. You had to be better than the Joneses. And I so often compare ourselves instead of, like you said, at the very beginning, just comparing ourselves to us and knowing that we are moving forward, I think, is really important. And I think the idea that really inspired you to write this book and to be able to share your message with the story and hopes that it could impact else, somebody else out there.
Tina Brandau [00:14:24]: So I really wrote this story truly from my heart to impact one person. I wanted to help one person. And if I helped 1, it was all worth it. I don’t know if you know this or not, but writing a book is not an easy thing to do, especially when you’re writing about very vulnerable things about your own personal life. I mean, writing a story about someone else might feel different, but this was it was a lift. And it’s not just write a book. There’s a lot of steps and a lot of learning that goes into it. But at the end of the day, I wrote it to help one person, and I said if it helped 1, it would. It would all be worth it. And — Yeah.
I really thought somewhere, there’s somebody out there who’s sitting in some change, some challenge, and they need to know that they can become a stoppable too. And I kept running into people over and over and over. My accident was 15 years ago. and I keep running into people ever since then who keeps saying one day I will or someday I will and I’m like, yeah. you don’t know when your someday or one day is ever gonna come. Don’t wait. Let’s do it now. Let’s become unstoppable. And that’s why I did it because you noticed the sub line, or the sub head of my book is the real-life story of overcoming adversity and becoming unstoppable in life and business because that’s what I want for everyone. You don’t need to wait to become what’s possible in your life. Today is the day you can start becoming impossible. Becoming what’s possible.
Brianna Brown [00:15:53]: Oh, absolutely. And I Always think back to sometimes you’ll talk to someone, and they’ll say, I wish I could. I wish I could one day, one day, one day. And I’m like, you’ve got to stop that narrative. because today is that day. We have to make it happen. Like, I am such a planner. You know, as you get to know me, I am a planner. I’m like, you know, and I once hung out with somebody and they said, we’ll just figure it out. And I thought, oh, no way. That’s not how Brianna works. We’re gonna figure this out today. And because I can’t imagine just letting life happen. I cannot imagine it. I’m like, we need to figure out where we are going? How are we gonna get there? What are the steps that we need to do. You know? And so I absolutely agree with you on that.
Tina Brandau [00:16:37]:
When you have no plan. This is something I actually wrote about in the book, and I’m gonna go ahead and lay it out for you guys. I refer to it as going to your refrigerator. opening it, taking out whatever you have in there, and cooking it, and hoping to get a specific recipe outcome So you wanna have fettuccine alfredo and you take everything out of your fridge and put it in a pot and expect it to become fettuccine alfredo, it’s never gonna work. you can’t work at random to come up with a specific solution. You can’t do that. And so that’s not how life works. But I also don’t believe in having a concrete plan. I believe in having a vision. I believe in having goals, but I also believe in being fluid because sometimes the best road travel is the woman you’re led down. I never planned any of this. Believe me. I never planned this, and I never — Right.
But it’s been the best thing that’s ever happened in my life. minus my children. Of course, they come first and my husband. Yeah. But in terms of my professional career, being able to go out and then spire people all day long every day has been the biggest blessing that has happened in my life.
Brianna Brown [00:17:52]: And I love that. And I’d love to hear more about, you know, in your bio, about you being a success coach. So how long have you been doing this success coach part of it because I know you said you were a business executive, so I’d love to hear more about that side of your business.
Tina Brandau [00:18:08]: So I actually spent 30 plus years in biz in corporate America. I’ve always been responsible for coaching and leadership development. That’s been my lane inside of corporations. that the goal setting and development pieces. And so I have been coaching for 30 plus years. And somewhere in gosh, but it’s been…
It was 2018, actually. I decided, again, it comes down to decisions we make. I decided that I was going to not just coach for corporations, but I was gonna coach business owners, small business owners because big corporations have big budgets and can afford to hire people like me to do what I do. So I then decided to start working with small businesses. because they didn’t have the same resources, and I wanted them to be able to grow their businesses and have the same results. So I started success coaching. in that vein at that time. And I’ve been doing that since 2018. And during the pandemic, I realized that so many more businesses needed help than the large corporations that I actually left my corporate role once I got the company stabilized and everything was okay with their own adaptations and changes with COVID and everything, I then left and went into this individually for small businesses and leaders and smaller organizations so they could have the same benefit of it. And that’s what I do. Whether it be ready to level your career up or if you’re looking at having an executive coach because frankly I have a coach I believe everybody needs a coach because you cannot see your own blind spots, and that’s what success coaching does for you. It’s helps you see your own blind spots to move beyond them and to become unstoppable of becoming what’s possible in your life.
Brianna Brown [00:19:54]: Yes. I think that everybody should have a life coach and somebody that really pushes you in those directions because the coach that I have literally said, you can’t read the ingredients from inside the bottle.
Tina Brandau [00:20:06]: That’s exactly right.
Brianna Brown [00:20:07]: Yeah. And I loved that perspective. And I also love the analogy that you use with the refrigerator because I thought first, you were gonna say, you know, you open the refrigerator, and all you find is ingredients. And I’d be like, you know, I’m really looking for a meal, but it’s true. Like, if you don’t have where you’re going, then you’re just throwing it out there and hoping to get there. And I think that’s how so many people live because they don’t know how to take that next step. And then I think, okay, then get a life coach because you can literally find that person to push you in the right direction. And what do you find most fulfilling about being that, you know, success coach and what do you feel is your you know, the thing that keeps pushing you forward to help them.
Tina Brandau [00:20:51]: I think the biggest thing for me is creating organizations that are sustainable that can allow them to continue to provide for all the people that work for the organizations, right? So helping companies be successful so that they can take care of their employees. That is what we like to be at more than anything, helping them be better leaders so that they can make better leaders. And it really does light me up from the bottom. and honestly here’s another piece of it. I’m a lot older than you are. I’ve been in the business world for a very long time. When I started, I was the only female executive The only female executive. And I often joked that I took the heel off my stiletto broke open the door and stuck the sole in the shoe in the door to keep it propped open for the next to come behind. But being the only woman there, I still strive to bring more women into management into leadership and to as full business ownership. because my mom never got the opportunity. I fought for the opportunity. I don’t want anyone else to have to fight that way. I want them to be able to come in with confidence in women. We need confidence.
Brianna Brown [00:21:54]: Yes.
Tina Brandau [00:21:54]: Oh my gosh. We need confidence. You know what? If you don’t have any, borrow mine. Take my exhibit to you.
Brianna Brown [00:22:00]: Yes.
Tina Brandau [00:22:01]: The competence and know-how. You have to have the competence and the competence to make it and be successful. and that’s what I show up to do. And that’s why I use my business background and I coach primarily women in the business world or the business realm. because life coaching is one thing. And let me say this. You can have life without business. You cannot have business without life. That would be like me taking off your arms and saying go to work and do your work now because I’m pulling your arms off. That’s what it’s like to take life out of business. You can’t do it. So that’s why I do both life and business coaching because you have to do both when you’re a business owner or a leader.
Brianna Brown [00:22:39]: I absolutely think it’s so important to remember who you are and what you want to bring to that business. And that’s why sometimes a lot of the people that I talk to kind of leave that corporate world because it’s so not like, there’s not enough freedom of expression, and I love small business owners. I’m like, let get all the female business owners together and, like, expand because there’s so many great ideas. And you mentioned back in 2018, and it reminds me of when you said 2020 and how there was such a need. And I loved that in that terrible pandemic, that what came out of it was seeing so many people break out of their shells and try new ideas and build their businesses and really go back to being creative. I thought that was one of the most exciting things to see what people could come up with.
Tina Brandau [00:23:32]: Yes.
Brianna Brown [00:23:32]: And I just love your story so much, and you have so much confidence. So if somebody’s listening is like, well, I definitely don’t have confidence or I don’t have those that inspiration or that motivation, like, what would you recommend to somebody, you know, besides having a success coach, of course? but that they could do right now to really encourage their self-confidence or their self-worth or their motivation, any of that. 1,
Tina Brandau [00:24:00]: stop the negative narrative. Stop it, and don’t tell me you can’t because you absolutely positively can’t. Okay? Yeah. Stop the negative narrative. I call her negative Nancy and negative Nancy is not allowed to live in my head. She’s just not allowed to live in your head anymore either. And in fact, I can have your listeners do a really quick exercise that I love doing for me. You can have a negative conversation about absolutely positively anything that you want to. here’s what I want you to do right now. I want you to think about your shampoo. Think about your shampoo and an inert object. Think about your shampoo. Think about the things you do not like about your shampoo. Negative thoughts are coming up in your head right now. k. Now I want you to think about the thoughts of your shampoo that you love. What do you love about your shampoo? Which one feels better to you?
Brianna Brown [00:24:55]: Of course, the positive ones that you’re like, I love that it does this.
Tina Brandau [00:24:59]: How can you have a negative narrative about an innate object? Right. If you can have a negative narrative about shampoo, You can have a negative narrative about anything. So what do you do? You choose to listen to the positive. You don’t get in your shower every morning and go; I don’t like the container. I don’t like the container. You put shampoo on your hair, and you blow out. It smells good. Or you go, my hair feels good with this shampoo. You don’t go, like the font size they used on the bottle. You don’t do that. So if you won’t do that to your shampoo, dang it, don’t do it to yourself.
Brianna Brown [00:25:35]: Yes. And or just like the way that you would speak to your best friend —
Tina Brandau [00:25:39]: Yes.
Brianna Brown [00:25:39]: You know, like, speak exactly how you would speak to your friends, like, in that positive light. And also if they’re experiencing something negative, you wouldn’t be like, wow. You are so terrible. Like, how could you do something so idiotic? Well, some friends might do that, but only the ones that are, like, the hardcore ones, you
Tina Brandau [00:25:59]: know, Even if they are, they’re not your friends if they’re saying you’re idiotic.
Brianna Brown [00:26:03]: True. True. you know, you want that positive love that you would expect from a friend like, say the same thing to yourself because so often, you know, you hear those negative things in your mindset. And it’s like, why do we Why do we say such negative things to ourselves? Like, let’s speak more positively.
Tina Brandau [00:26:23]: I believe wholeheartedly, you can change the narrative of your life if you change the script in your head.
Brianna Brown [00:26:29]: 1000%.
Tina Brandau [00:26:30]: And how do you do that? You ask yourself something that I had to ask myself. So when your brain has been damaged, I don’t know if you know this or not, but your brain actually fills in the missing pieces. Think about the time when you’re riding in the car and a song comes on the radio and you start singing and you sing along, but all of a sudden, you don’t know the words, but yet you keep singing. Right? your brain fills in those words. Whether you’re right or wrong, it fills them in. But when your brain’s been damaged, it fills in things would go around asking people all the time is what I said true? Did is that true? Did that really happen? Cause I don’t know if it’s true or not because it’s filling in the missing blanks for me. When your brain fills in information, you have no idea what’s correct or what’s incorrect. So I would ask myself these questions, and I want you to ask yourself this. Is this really true? Is this really happening? because I guarantee you 90% of the time, that’s not true. Yeah. But what I want you to do is not just answer, and I wrote this in the book too. Don’t ask yourself that question once. pause and ask yourself again. Is this question true or whatever I’m thinking? Is it true? And then I want you to pause and ask yourself, “Is it really true?” because when you ask yourself it in that fashion and in that tone to yourself, is it really true? You’re gonna find that the answer most of the time is no. It’s not really true. This is you living in self, wallow, or self-doubt, or self-drinker or better yet. You’re afraid of whatever it is and it’s protectionism. You’re protecting yourself from being outside your comfort zone. So when you ask yourself, is it true? Is it really true? You’ll find out most of the time it’s not. And then what I would say to myself and remember, I was functioning like a very young child. If I found out it wasn’t through or it wasn’t helpful, I would say bye. Bye. Like, go away. And that was it. And I would move on from there. There’s a whole thing I put inside the book about because you can talk the narrative away. It’s not hard to do. You just have to want to do it and stay focused on doing it. until you develop it as a habit.
Brianna Brown [00:28:35]: And that’s the part that people need to change is the want to do it because so often you hear people say, I wish this was different. I wish that was different, but then they just stay right there. They stay in that, and it’s a lot of fear based because they are fearful of the unknown and they are unsure of about spending time on something that might not work where they say I’m not going to I’m too lazy. I’m not going to go do that thing because that’s gonna be a lot of work. And I’m like,
Tina Brandau [00:29:03]: someone says they’re too lazy. most of the time that means they’re too afraid. Too afraid. It’s fear based. It’s fear of failure. because for whatever reason, we have been conditioned to believe that failure or failing means you’re a failure. And that’s not true. That’s just not true. And to be fair, I think there’s an equal, I won’t say equal. I think there’s also a population that is afraid of success.
Brianna Brown [00:29:30]: Oh, yes. Yeah. There’s it’s crazy because some people are naturally inclined but then other people have that fear of being at the top because then they don’t know what expect expectations are after that moment. Yep. You know, because I always imagined myself as being somebody who wanted to be a leader, but I do like being with others. but I never wanted to be the CEO of a company. I’m like, I have no desire to be at the top, top, top. I just wanna hang out with everybody down here. I’m cool with that. Let’s just all lead each other. but some people have that fear of doing something that either exposes them to the top or just being too far up there. And there’s nothing wrong with that. You know, nothing wrong if you wanna be the CEO or if you wanna be the accountant, whatever floats your boat. Right?
Tina Brandau [00:30:19]: Right. Right? I always wanted to be the person who was taking that next step because I always felt like it was something new to explore. It was for me. It was a great adventure for me to go explore it. And there were times where I was like, I have no idea what I’m doing here. Oh my gosh, I’m so far out of my comfort zone. And yes, there are a lot of people who do fear, success, and fear failure, but it doesn’t really matter as long as you are where you want to be. That’s the right place for you, but don’t be somewhere because you’re afraid to be somewhere else.
Brianna Brown [00:30:52]: especially when you know that you want it. Like, so often people experience, especially as entrepreneurs that dip where they just think, oh, why am I doing this? What am I doing? And that’s where that success coaching comes in for someone to say, hey, please keep going. your message needs to be heard. People need you because you never know when you’re gonna meet that person that will change everything, or you never know when you’re gonna be that voice. Like you said, that one person you wanted to inspire with your book. You know?
Tina Brandau [00:31:21]:
And you just hit on something. First of all, I love Seth Godin in the dip. I don’t know if you’ve read it or not.
Brianna Brown [00:31:25]: I want to. This is marketing is on my TBR List.
Tina Brandau [00:31:29]: I love anything, Seth. I love books as you well know. I actually have a book club that I do. I love love books.
Brianna Brown [00:31:36]: I love that.
Tina Brandau [00:31:37]: And so one of the things that I was gonna say is I wanna be really transparent and really candid with your crew. So I’ve been tremendously successful in my life. I’ve had all kinds of successes. I’ve had some major setbacks as I talked about. I’ve also been on my own journey, though. I’ve had failures of epic proportion, things that I thought I wanted, that I absolutely did not want, things that I thought were gonna go great that blew up in my face. I had things that didn’t go well, but then I had things that went beyond my comprehension, beyond what I could have ever envisioned So there is no linear way to business, guys. It doesn’t exist. There are hills and there are valleys and the people who end up winning are the ones that can ride the waves. So you have to find your way through it, and you ask how do you get the confidence How do you get the self, you know, the self-awareness and belief in yourself, etcetera? Sometimes you borrow it from other people. So besides success coaching, how else can you do it? It’s who you surround yourself with. So, you know, Jim Rowan has famously said you become like the 5 people you spend the most time with.
Tina Brandau [00:32:50]: I love Jim Rohn. Jim Rohn is like a hero of mine from 30 years ago. I knew him when he was much younger, we’ll say. Yeah. So he is my hero. I love Jim Rowan, but he said that. And that is something that all of us can do. And if you don’t have someone to surround yourself with, find someone. Go out and if someone’s doing what you wanna do, reach out to them. Don’t be afraid to ask. What’s the worst thing they can say to you is I’m sorry I can’t help you now or worse yet go away. That’s the worst thing that can happen.
Brianna Brown [00:33:22]: Yeah. The best thing
Tina Brandau [00:33:23]: that can happen is they take you under your under their wing and they develop you. Don’t be afraid to ask surround yourself with people who are doing what you’re doing and for the love of all things, for the love of all things, do not try to fake it till you make it There is no faking it. When you fake it, people know you’re faking it. Go surround yourself with people doing what you wanna do and do like they’re doing but do it on your own in your own way in your own flavor. And you’ll meet with success not initially, not immediately. It takes practice.
Brianna Brown [00:33:58]: And I think it’s important to decide what is your level of success. because some people might think that their level of success is making millions. Other people might say, I just wanted to be successful enough to stay at home with my kids. and not have to have, you know, a job outside of the home. Like, it just you figure out what your level of success is and then strive to get there whatever that is. and then make sure it’s like that you’re always giving your best to that because so often people get stuck in the weeds if I have to do this, I have to do it that way. I should do this, or I should do that. And I’m like, oh, shitting all over yourself. Okay? Note? I said that one more time.
Tina Brandau [00:34:41]: He said I actually wrote all about shutting all over yourself in the It’s inside it. They need to read this book. Sounds like we’re about speaking from the same book here.
Brianna Brown [00:34:49]: Yes, I love it. I love it so much. And I think that Everybody needs to hear an inspirational story, especially because so many of us, or I would think all of us have been through something, whether it’s you know, a small traumatic event or a major one. It’s impacted us in some way and to push through that and to really overcome the things that we are hurting from, that’s important, but you have to be not necessarily, I wouldn’t say fearless but I would say brave, you know, because sometimes when you just take away the fear, fear can actually motivate you. You know, you can’t I don’t know if you could ever be truly fearless.
Tina Brandau [00:35:29]: I don’t want you to be fearless. And you ever want me to be fearless because if you’re fearless, you’re not feeling. I don’t want you to be fearless. I want you to be brave enough to face the fear. Be brave enough. And bravery comes from confidence and competence. That’s where it comes from. When you get to the place where you feel like you can do something because you’re competent at it, that will build your confidence to do it, which will build your bravery to take action. And that’s all it takes. And it’s a flywheel. how a flywheel works is it takes the first little bit of momentum and it builds upon itself until it’s going so fast that you can’t stop it from moving and that’s what happens to you. Build your confidence in your competence. Build your big bravery. Take that step. and that flywheel will take off. It may take 3 or 4 tries before it takes off, but once it does, you’ll be in the position I’m in right now where you’re standing back going when did all this happen?
Brianna Brown [00:36:28]: I feel like you’re saying exactly what I needed to hear today because, you know, currently in the process of, like, building, you know, my own business and trying to grow that and feeling
Tina Brandau [00:36:38]: like — Okay. Stop right there. Stop right there. You are not trying to
Brianna Brown [00:36:42]: I knew as soon as I said trying, I was like, oh, shit. I said the wrong word.
Tina Brandau [00:36:46]: Yeah. We don’t try. We don’t try. Here’s the thing. I went from there is no try ever, ever, ever in life to during my recovery period, I would say try again, but I didn’t mean try in the same way. I just meant it was okay to fail and do it again and do it again. The word try itself actually will tell your brain. It triggers your brain to not really give the effort. Do not use the word try. I don’t know if you know this or not, but if you ever see a hypnotist in a big show, tell somebody to try to get off a chair. They can’t stand up because your brain is triggered then to stay seated because Tri means you can’t. So we need to pull that word out of our vocabulary and my coach says all the time. You live in a no try zone. And so we’re gonna not try to build your business. You’re building it. It may not be where you want it to be. It may not be there yet. But you’re building your business.
Brianna Brown [00:37:41]: I love the power of yet, you know, that growth mindset. I love it so much. As a former teacher, we always what is it? Carol Dweck. Yes. I love it. Exactly. Because she believes in that and tries to teach others that it is possible, that it is possible. And so if you were going to take all of that and say, you know, where do you see yourself in 5 years? You know, where do you what are you looking forward to most in the future? Personally, professionally, Where do you hope to go from here?
Tina Brandau [00:38:15]: Anywhere I want. Anywhere I want. So you were talking about do I wanna have a multimillion-dollar business? I’ve grown multimillion dollar businesses before. I don’t wanna do that this time. I don’t want that. It’s okay to say no. Money is not everything. Money is not success. What is success is doing what lights you up. So in my ideal world in the coming year, in the coming year, I will become Nana for the first time. I will become a first time Nana. I will hold my 1st born grandchild. And when I hold my first born grandchild. I don’t wanna feel like, oh my gosh. I need to be working right now. I need to be working 16-hour days, building my business 7 days a week, no, I wanna hold my baby and not worry about that. So what I will be doing is running my book club, which is for leaders and entrepreneurs and business owners. I’ll be running a book club and I will be doing some coaching. I’m gonna shift my one-on-one coaching into more group coaching so that I can pull back on my time some and I will continue to speak around the country to inspire people. I will continue to do that. but I’m not working 7 days a week, 16 hours a day. Could I? Absolutely. Could I make millions? Absolutely. I choose not to. and it’s okay to choose not to. It’s okay to choose what fits with you. So that’s what I will be doing going forward.
Brianna Brown [00:39:41]: And I love the idea of group coaching because it makes me think of you know, master minds because you get to hear so many different people’s opinions and how it works for them and meet other people who are building a variety of different businesses, I think, is really important because if you, you know, I’m in a mastermind with one person and it’s a great opportunity to share our message with each other. But being able to hear from other perspectives is really important.
Tina Brandau [00:40:07]: So I do have a high-end mastermind as well, and a mastermind to me is very different than group coaching. A mastermind for me is where each person brings in their problem and the group helps problem solve it for them. Whereas group coaching is a topic specific coaching that we do with each person chiming in on that. So it’s not as individualized as a mastermind is. I’ve run masterminds for years, and I love Master Mining. It is one of my favorite things to do. But again, it’s in a group setting. So I’m not doing as much one on one. Last year, I coached over a hundred people one on one. That’s a lot of one-on-one coaching. Yes. I’m gonna do more group coaching and I’m gonna do more in the realm of master mining. So my high-end mastermind probably won’t grow by much in the next year or so, because again, it takes a lot of time to put that together.
Brianna Brown [00:41:00]: Yeah. and just to get the message out there. And I love that so much. And I love that you mentioned also that you are a book lover and have your own book club, you know, especially for entrepreneurs So if you had to recommend your top book recommendations along with standing strong, the real life story of overcoming adversity and becoming unstoppable in life and business, just wanted to throw that title out there. That’s her number one book recommendation, of course. What other books do you think could be impactful you know, and meaningful that you definitely recommend for someone.
Tina Brandau [00:41:33]: So I believe wholeheartedly with every fiber of my being that there are 36 books that every business owner and leader needs to read. Oh, I love that. Yes. Starting out. Because I’m sorry.
Brianna Brown [00:41:45]: I love that. I love that. I’m, like, ready to hear all of them. Okay.
Tina Brandau [00:41:48]: Well, I will send you a link with some of them because if I send through 36, what’s gonna happen if I send you 36 is everyone’s gonna get overwhelmed and no one’s gonna do anything. That’s what’s gonna happen. I think there’s 3 that we need to start with. Yes. The first and they’re all business books, but the business books help you grow your business. And they always have a life element to If they don’t have a life element to them, I really don’t use them. So the 3 that I want you to start with, and they’re ones that you’ve that you probably have heard of or many of you have probably read I think you need to read think and grow rich when you first start. By the way, I have to tell you just as a sign up because I am so dang proud of this My book actually Think and Grow Rich. It really did. Okay. I love that. So Think and Grow Rich is the first book that I would recommend you do. The second book would be how to win friends and influence people.
Brianna Brown [00:42:43]: Oh, yes.
Tina Brandau [00:42:44]: Now there is a whole other book that I recommend you follow-up on that, but that’s not where I want you to start. And I believe in starting small. See, the one thing that I learned throughout my accident and through all my recovery is that I had to take things simply afterwards. And I realized just how complicated adults made everything. So now I am focused on keeping things simple. So I won’t let you get overwhelmed. I won’t let you go overwhelmed. I will tell you, let’s take it simple. So you’re going to read thinking grow rich, you’re going to look at your, how to win friends and influence people, and then 7 habits of highly effective people. And I’ve had people say to me, but what about the 8th habit? Save the 8th habit for later. Save it for later. We’re not there yet. And here’s what I want you to do. I want you to read each of those books and I want you to take one thing from each book. That’s it. I can’t tell you how many times because I’ve been doing book clubs for. I don’t want probably 25 years to be fair.
Brianna Brown [00:43:43]: Wow.
Tina Brandau [00:43:43]: Yeah. It’s inside corporate America. We re books a lot. Yeah. I actually believe that leaders are readers, and I actually have a company called leaders or readers, but that’s another story their day. Yeah, the reality is, if you read a book and you take away 10 action items, You’re again gonna get overwhelmed. You’re not gonna go on to the next book. You’re not gonna learn another tip and another topic you’re not gonna learn something more. So take one thing from each book. I personally, I’m gonna give you a little scoop inside of me. I have 10 books that I read every single year over and over and over and over again. Why do I do that? Because I am a firm believer that the author comes sneaking into my book library at night and writes new things because when I read it the next time, there’s stuff there that I never saw the first time or the second time or the third time. It’s like a movie. You keep finding more and more and more each time you read it. and I only want you to implement 1 or 2 things from every book, so you don’t get overwhelmed. And at that rate, You could read them every year and keep implementing and keep implementing if it’s a good book.
Brianna Brown [00:44:54]: Right?
Tina Brandau [00:44:54]: There are a lot of what I would consider to be not really good book. out there. So I again start with those three books. They’re super simple reads. They’re super inspiring for you to read through and really understand a little bit more about how to function in your business and grow your business.
Brianna Brown [00:45:13]: And I think it’s so great to remember one action item because so often I think that’s my favorite phrase during this interview. I’ll say so often, but we get overwhelmed with so much information thrown at us, especially when it comes to self-improvement books. And it’s like, you know, you really need to take it, dive into it, figure it out and then say, okay. What is the takeaway I want from this? What is the takeaway? And so even from this conversation, if somebody’s listening and you’re like, okay. What’s the one takeaway that you would want someone to have from this conversation? What would you say?
Tina Brandau [00:45:50]: My one takeaway is that life can be done very simplistically without over complication 1 p at a time. And then I would say that that the follow-up to that is you can become unstoppable at becoming what’s possible if you live 1 p at a time.
Brianna Brown [00:46:10]: I love that mentality of the one paint of time because then you, you know, we think in pictures. So I just imagine that because Some of them are going to fall right off. And don’t worry about those. They’re lost. It’s okay. some, you’re gonna squish and mess up, and they’re not gonna be a good pea anymore. But then I was envisioning a frozen piece, so some people might have envisioned, like, you know, the nice fresh piece. Some people might have imagined the soft sweet piece, you know, but, like, every person’s perception is different in their mind. But if you, however, you decide to do it is what matters the most. And I love that mentality. And then I also thought of when you were mentioning about how you read the same books, I once saw a quote that says no two people ever read the same book.
Tina Brandau [00:46:58]: That’s very true. And that’s why I love the community of talking about it. Get me a group of people together to talk about a book and how to apply it to your world, and I can go for 6 hours and not wanna lose energy about it.
Brianna Brown [00:47:10]: and I love that you said that because I needed that positive energy today because I actually have 2 book clubs. I have my fiction fund where we read a book by a female author, and then we have our self-improvement book club. And I love them both so much because to talk with other women about books, and how they perceived them, what questions came up for them, how they interpreted it. I learn so much from the badass book besties is what I call it And it’s so it’s one of my favorite things that I do. And I used to be a teacher, and so I would talk to kids about books, And I thought, I wanna I wanna hear what adults have to say. You know, I love kids, but I really wanna hear what adults have to say, and I love it so much. like, just to be able to have that intellectual conversation and around books is my most favorite thing and my favorite joy. So I love that you do that as well.
Tina Brandau [00:48:02]: Somebody wants to ask me if you could do anything in the world that you wanted to do, what would it be? and my answer was to inspire people. That’s what I would love to do. And they said, well, what would your second thing do be? because, you know, that all added do what you love and never work a day in your life. And I said, well, if they pay me to read books, it’d be okay. Yes. Yes. Absolutely. So that helps too. So my book club is a paid book club, and you will find that the level of commitment in a paid book club is very different than in a free book club as well.
Brianna Brown [00:48:32]: So the universe sent your soul to me because I kid you not, Tina. I just had a conversation with my husband today right before our interview. So you must have been listening. I said, You know, you don’t often hear about paid for book clubs, but I have a paid for book club as well. And I said, you know, I’m providing value. You know, we’ve got there’s accountability to read the book, and there’s discussion questions that I send them. You know, How can I encourage people to see that there’s a value added to it? Because to me, I find it so valuable. It keeps me accountable to read. I’ve met some incredible women. And, you know, some people have said, like, why would you pay for a book club? And then I’m like, but why not? And somebody once said that they had a program where they were. It was personal training, and he was charging for his services. And someone said, why would you charge for personal training. You can get that for free on YouTube. And he said, how’s it working out for you? Are you doing it? Are you doing the exercises? And that was such a mind shift for me because I thought, you know, yes, it is a paid for book club, but we’re providing community. we’re providing the accountability to read this. And what do you do in your book club that is your value added? Because I’m saying my I’d love to hear what you do in yours to provide that value.
Tina Brandau [00:49:58]: Well, you have to remember. I’ve been doing them for 25 years. so much perspective and scenarios and frankly coaching and advice that comes out of it, like you know, I’m dealing with this, and I see this in here. How can I apply that here that that it brings value to it? And so What I end up finding is that people well, first of all, most of the people in my world come because they want my energy and they want confidence and they you know, the five people you wanna be around. That’s why they show up to my group. It’s gotta be around it. And the tenacity of it. And I will ask inquisitively. I drive them to think and look at things differently and just my perspective. So they’re actually paying for the community to step up, the community to help them, but they’re also getting me in that that offer as well. and getting out soon and not to sound bragadocious or conceited in any way.
Brianna Brown [00:50:54]:
Oh, be bragadocious I’d love that new word.
Tina Brandau [00:50:57]: They’re willing to pay for that to get the extra experience and, frankly, time. So they get to be in my world for a very low investment versus what would cost to be with me one on one coaching.
Brianna Brown [00:51:10]: Yeah. And I love that one of my members said exactly what you said. You give me the gift of time because if it wasn’t for this book club, maybe I would read, but I don’t read as often. And now it’s like, I get to read. I’m diving into these things, and I think it’s so important especially to talk with others because I’ve had plenty of books that I said, did anybody else read this? No. Nobody. Oh, I just wanna tell you about this story that I just read. It was so great. And if you haven’t dived into it, it’s you don’t get to talk to anybody about it. So you’re like, I love that’s what I love about the book club. So fantastic that you have one as well. And I am so glad that we had this conversation, Tina. I think that the universe brought us together, and I’m so grateful for that so much.
Tina Brandau [00:51:53]: I love that you’re doing that. And I have to tell you, I know we’re friends on Facebook and that we follow along with each other. yes, the 4 agreements are one of the books that I put in my must list and absolutely is.
Brianna Brown [00:52:06]: and there’s so much value, and that is one of those books, like you said earlier, that if I read it in 6 months, I’m gonna be a different person, and I’ll read it with a different eye. And talking with the other women about it, they saw something else. And I would say, oh, I didn’t even think about that perspective or being able to dive in it in a different way. and hear the perspectives of different ages, different backgrounds. Yes. It’s so impactful. So, such a great conversation. Where can everyone learn more about you and your work? Because I think everybody needs to know who Tina is.
Tina Brandau [00:52:41]: So you can find me on my website at successcoachingsolutions.com or better yet I can actually send you my QR code so everybody can get information from me right there and get whatever piece of me that they’re looking for.
Brianna Brown [00:52:54]: Yes. Definitely. Well, thank you so much. And I look forward to –
Tina Brandau [00:52:58]: Oh, and by the way, today. Today, my book is live on Audible. So they can also find these Audible today. If they if they’re a listener, They can find me on Audible.
Brianna Brown [00:53:06]: I love it, and I will be sure to put that in the show notes as well so that everybody can find it and learn such great valuable information from you. So thank you so much.
Tina Brandau [00:53:14]: It’s been a pleasure. I have loved this and thank you for providing a community of space for people to love books, learn, and to grow.
Brianna Brown [00:53:21]: Oh, thank you so much. I appreciate you.
Tina Brandau [00:53:24]: Take care.