41: Finding Fulfillment Where You Are: Slowing Down, Letting Go, and Living in the Moment – Badass Books and Besties
If You’re Always Racing to the Next Moment…
What happens to the one you’re in?
That’s the question that sparked this episode of Badass Books and Besties—and this post. We live in a world that constantly tells us to go faster, achieve more, and check the next thing off the list before the ink is even dry on the last one. But here’s the truth: fulfillment doesn’t come from arriving. It comes from being.
In this episode, I’m sharing my own journey of learning to slow down—how a health scare, life changes, and even the long-awaited publishing of my debut novel Perpetually 24 became my wake-up calls to find peace right where I am. You’ll also get three simple tools you can start using today to feel more grounded in the moment.
The Pressure to Always “Be Ahead”
Have you ever felt like you’re in a race you didn’t sign up for? The pressure to be more productive, more successful, more everything? I have. For years, I measured my worth by my output—how many tasks I could knock off my to-do list, how far ahead I was on some invisible timeline.
Brené Brown says, “Owning our story and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing that we will ever do.” For me, part of owning my story meant admitting I was chasing perfection instead of embracing the present. And when life threw me curveballs, I realized something important: sometimes, you just need to come up for air.
When My Body Said “Slow Down”
My turning point came when I was diagnosed with Inappropriate Sinus Tachycardia (IST), a condition where your heart beats faster than normal—even at rest. My average heart rate was around 110 beats per minute. And it wasn’t because I was exercising—it was because I was living life at full speed, every second of every day.
I was juggling raising two young kids, running a business, keeping up with household responsibilities, and saying “yes” to way too many commitments. My heart was literally telling me it was too much.
After starting medication, I finally began to feel better—but the experience left me questioning how I was living. Why was I doing so much at the expense of my health? What was I really chasing?
The Book That Should Have Been My Celebration
One of the clearest moments when I realized I was rushing past my own joy was when I published my first novel, Perpetually 24. I’d spent years dreaming about this moment—finally becoming an author. But when I clicked “publish” and announced it to the world… nothing clicked. There was no huge, cinematic rush of joy.
Instead, I immediately started planning my next book.
It wasn’t until the pre-order copies arrived, and I was standing in the post office with my kids, holding a stack of boxes, that it hit me: Holy shit. This is my book. People are going to hold it in their hands. That was my celebration—not a launch party, not a fancy dinner, but a quiet, powerful moment of gratitude.
Life Has a Way of Piling On
Since then, life has brought a lot of change and loss:
- My dad’s wife passed away, and my sister and I helped him go through her belongings.
- My mom was diagnosed with mouth cancer and passed away earlier this year.
- My stepfather passed away just a month ago, and now I’m handling his estate without a will.
- All while raising my kids, running my business, and navigating my heart condition.
Each of those moments knocked the wind out of me. But they also taught me something: slowing down isn’t a luxury—it’s survival.
Brianna Wiest writes in The Pivot Year, “Sometimes the best thing you can do is nothing at all. Let the pieces settle. Let the water clear. Let yourself breathe.”
The List That Changed My Perspective
To shift my mindset, I made a list of my accomplishments:
- Transitioned from teacher to school counselor to librarian to stay-at-home mom to online tutor to career coach.
- Published my debut novel, Perpetually 24.
- Bought a beautiful home.
- Built deep relationships with my sister and best friends.
- Launched and grew my Badass Book Besties community.
Seeing it all written down made me realize I wasn’t “behind” at all. I was right where I needed to be.
Three Ways to Stay Present
Here are three simple practices that have helped me—and might help you—stay grounded:
- Name Five Things You See Right Now
A grounding technique that can bring you back to the present, especially during anxiety. Notice small details like the sunlight, your coffee mug’s color, or your pet’s sleepy blinks. - Create “Pause Points” in Your Day
Schedule two or three 5-minute breaks where you stop, stretch, breathe, and ask yourself, How do I feel right now? - Celebrate One Small Win Every Evening
Before bed, jot down one thing you’re proud of from that day. It could be as simple as sending an email you’ve been avoiding or cooking a meal you actually enjoyed.
You Are Not Behind
Like my friend Judie says, “I am proud of you for going, and doing, and being, and for all that you are. And all that you want to continue to be.”
You are not behind. You are not failing. You are exactly where you are meant to be, right now.
Book Recommendations from This Episode
If you want to go deeper into these ideas, check out:
The Gifts of Imperfection by Brené Brown
You Are a Badass by Jen Sincero
The Pivot Year by Brianna Wiest
Wherever You Go, There You Are by Jon Kabat-Zinn
The Things You Can See Only When You Slow Down by Haemin Sunim
Perpetually 24 by Brianna J. J. Brown
Let’s Work Together!
💬 Want to feel more grounded and at peace with where you are right now? This is exactly the kind of work I do as a coach. Together, we’ll cut through the overwhelm, get clear on what matters most, and create a life you actually enjoy living—not just someday, but starting now. Book a free connection call at Badass Life Coaching.
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